I’ve made a commitment to myself (at least to try) to not allow my mind to cause me suffering in its perception of things, regardless of what comes into my experience. Experience is all in the mind, after all, suffering included. As difficult as it can be for our waking minds to grasp that it's purely due to our minds that we accept as ‘reality’ things like our egoic separation from others, the apparent solidity of objects, the taste of ice cream, etc, our dreams hold clues to the contrary. For instance, how is it that we can experience an orgasm through dreaming, in the absence of actual physical stimulation, if not for the fact that sex itself is a mentally constructed experience?
A vision I was provided while writing this post was of a white light – like a sun – with lots of individual figures of white light coming off of it. They became more differentiated, the further your view moved from the source. Considering them as individuals though, the figures that were further away were still of the same intensity as the light from the (core).
You are the Light of source, one and the same. The further you are from source, the more darkness you have surrounding you, the more your perception of yourself becomes one of ‘individual’ /separate, the more different from you things around you look, and the more difficult it is to recognize yourself. It isn’t that you’re any less ‘holy’, any less worthwhile, any less loveable (or Loved). You use the darkness (of non-awareness, for instance) as a way – conversely – to be aware of yourself; you might even say that the darkness ‘supports’ you in that awareness. As a Loving act of creation, aspects of you will journey yet further into darkness to spread more of Yourself, to know yourself as Divine Light, through whatever incarnation you realise yourself in.
It matters not whether you’re presently living in darkness or living in light, on the side of the rock that’s in shadow, or the side in direct sunlight (ironically perhaps, as Light, you’re in essence creating and casting shadows Yourself). Difficulties that you’ve experienced in this or past lives have been tools for helping you to become aware of your innate nature, and you can do that regardless of which side of the rock (/’physicality’) you’re standing on. All that matters is something that you do naturally, without thinking, regardless of circumstances, which is to exercise your tendency to reach towards the light. Try to see your shadow and all that occurs – the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ – as a projection to facilitate this practice.
Included in this darkness are things like conditioning. You can choose to stick with others’ definitions of you, in the way of limitations as to who and what you are, who and what you’re not, and what is or is not possible. If you experience a tantric connection (sexual or non-) to other (spirit) beings, for instance, do you stay in the realm of ‘that’s not possible /real’, or do you move into an understanding and courageous acceptance and ownership of ‘this is another aspect of what I am’?
It’s a choice, not to allow your mind to seduce you into believing in separation. It’s also a choice to realise that once you’ve had a difficult experience or relationship that’s provided you with beliefs of ‘limitation’, it’s provided you with the possibility of changing how and what you perceive as your reality, also, and the possibility of standing in your truth, even amidst harsh resistance.
On the journey of recognizing and honouring your own medicines, you’re not the same person – as others have defined you – that you were a year ago, a minute ago, a previous incarnation ago, a few paragraphs ago, or who’ll you’ll be moments from Now, for that matter. Shed the parts of you that have got you to this moment of self-realisation. Leave those (other) aspects of Creation (expectations that others have placed upon you, for instance, or expectations that you’ve had for other people) to their own medicines. Release them as an element of shadow that’s helped you to realise yourself, and as a means of lightening your burden. Open yourself to the playful adventure of discovering more of what you Are (‘even’ in your everyday life). If the mind tells you any different, appreciate it in the same way, too (or don’t; either way, you’re still shining with the same undiminishable intensity).
I was guided to a second vision…
…a segmented blue (~’clarity’ blue) ball above a hand,
the hand of a large (God-like) figure of light, throwing the ball up /playing? with it
~ all these potentials for awareness, from all your incarnations (the joys and the traumas), creating a full circle, and You, being the God/dess being, enjoying your creation as Play. And from that point of observation, where do you take the vision from there? Where do you take your Creation from there? The possibilities are limitless.
Big Medicine Love to You